Male friends

Ever since I can remember, I have had more male friends than female friends. Ironically, most other Aries women I know also seem to have this same situation. Now, don't get me wrong I have some great female friends, but the number of true female friends that I have been able to talk to about anything is extremely limited.

I have been told by my own boyfriend that it is because I look at friendships more like a guy. I like some of the same topics that guys do and can usually stay on task with most sports topics, I play golf, and I am pretty open about my thoughts on most topices. It has even been said by Ira's male friends and a variety of my male friends that I am not like hanging out with a girl - the joke is that I am like one of the guys, but have breasts and no penis. Balls, sometimes though :-) This also might have something to do with being raised by my Dad as well. However, the one friendship feature that he had mentioned that I never noticed before is that I am extremely loyal. I have always known that, but I didn't realize that most women (I stress most, not all) are not. But, after thinking about it, I could see what he was talking about. Many women are friends with whoever is convenient at the time and I have been hurt by too many of my female friends to count.

So, this is my tribute to the 4 men that have been there for me throughout my life in various stages.

I have known my friend J since Kindergarten, and while he is not in my life right now, I have no doubt he will eventually be back. Even though I have also been best friends with his wife (known her since 2nd grade and just started talking to her again after a two year break), my friendship with him was always different. With his wife, she and I have shared many good times, bad times, and everything in between. But, there were certain things I felt I could never talk to her about in fear of being judged. With J, we could talk about anything at day, night, alone, or in a group. I always appreciated his honesty, even if I didn't want to hear it sometimes. I think he was the first person to look me in the eye and ask why I was still with my husband at the time. Sometimes, you just need that person to be blunt and know that they are looking out for your best interest. I truly miss him not being in my life right now.

I have known my ex-husband since I was 15 and while we should have probably never dated, nor gotten married, we have maintained a friendship. I don't know if we would have done this if it wasn't for our son, but we have and I appreciate that friendship. Sometimes, if just to remind myself why we are not married and how not to be sometimes. But, I grew from his strength at some of the lowest points in my life. He was the one who got me through the teenage years while I was still living with my Dad (love my Dad, but story for another day). He basically lives next door to me and our son has grown up with his parents being friends even though we don't always agree. That is a very rare thing to come across and I hope Jason realizes how lucky he is.

My boyfriend Ira and I have known each other since 1995. We were friends before we ever started dating, which I highly recommend. He has been my rock when I have needed one. We laugh, we have similar interests, and we can talk about anything. Sure, we have our issues, every couple does. But, I just can't imagine him not in my life in some way or another. Even after more than 7 years of being together we still go on dates and sometimes end up in our living room just talking (no tv in there :-)).

Lastly, there is my work friend S. For the past 11 years, we have vented to each other, talked, laughed, yelled at each other, and supported each other. We are the same age and have been on similar paths in our careers. We have been able to turn to each other for advice or sometimes just to complain. Like my friend J, I appreciate his brutal honesty at times even if I don't want to hear it just then. And, hopefully he appreciates mine, because God knows I give it.

These are the 4 guys that have made the biggest impacts in my life and probably know me better than any of my female friends. I appreciate them every day and we are proof that men and women really can be just friends (well except for the 2 that I did live with at some point - lol).